PEOPLE ARE FUNNY

It will be so much better when my back no longer hurts. I might shut up for a while. In the meantime the ironies of life are kicking my prone back. Don't worry no muscle relaxers today.

Have you noticed that when you have a problem, physical, mental, emotional, financial, whatever everyone wants to either ignore your issue completely or offer sympathy and empathy and comfort. I love you all who have listened to me whine about the last three years of dark forest I have navigated. I love those of you who listened to me whine about the four and a half years Current and I drove back and forth to Hot Springs waiting for his mother to finally give up the ghost.

Here is what I have noticed about people.

There really are humans exactly Karen Wiig's, (sorry honey, don't really know how to spell your name and I don't want to check at the moment), character who can always top you no matter what. There aren't just some, they are everywhere and they will not let you think or believe that you have experienced real suffering or pain.

My life story doesn't have many high points. It has an abundance of lows. I did that to me. Not blaming anyone anymore. Too stupid to learn. Too scared to say no or yes or whatever I should have said. It is all on me. I DID IT TO ME. No faith in me until it was way past sensible. Oh well, my cross to bear.

I whine to my friends and they to me. We share stories of, "I know what you mean..when I was in your place, blah, blah, blah". It's a sharing of understanding of the turmoil. For some. For others it is a contest.

Some people are just mean. I mean besides me.

Had this conversation recently, paraphrasing, with a friend.

Me: The whole parent process is making me crazy. If someone gave me the same answer twice. If my mother, bless her, would just die she would happier, dad would be George Clooney Sr., Sr. and I would be relieved of half my burden. All about me. (chuckle)

Friend: I stayed with my parents after mom's stroke and dad died before my sister took her out of state. I wrote all her checks. I cleaned out the house. It was filthy.

(heard this story 50 times, FYI, holding up 10 fingers, the international sign for, yes heard it this many times)

Me: I know what you mean, you should see my parent's house

Friend: My parents house was moldy and smelled

Me: Mine is covered in feces

Friend: I watched my dad die. It was awful. His urine was black. I had to be in the room

Me: That's heart breaking, I'm sorry

Friend: My mom was sick too. Took care of her for months with my kids, we had to live with her.

Me: you mentioned that, so sorry. So, have you been busy?

Friend: swamped

Me: I've been really busy too

Friend: You aren't in the heat, and you DON'T work. You do what you want. I am out there sweating.

(OK, this has been fun, now I am not having a good time anymore)

Me: That's right, I remember when I chose your profession.

Friend: SNIDE, that's not what I need. You are so spoiled and bitter. You don't know how the real world works.

Me: Thanks for calling?

Friend: Maybe if you spent less time whining and DID something you would feel better.

Me: Didn't really feel that bad until you called.

Friend: You just have everything handed to you, you don't know what it means to not be able to pay the rent. You think your problems are soooooo important. You think you are the only with problems don't you? What is with that BLOG? Really, THAT's how busy you are.

Me: Are you in a bar? Is this verbal abuse ala Coors Light? Because you know my rule about arguing with drunks. It's like trying to teach a pig to sing, it's impossible and the pig is annoying.

Friend: OH, so when you get drunk THAT's OK, you are so judgmental.

Me: need to go, really, don't want to have a conversation with you, sorry I mentioned an issue involving my parents, friend, won't bring them up to you again, AND I can recite your mom and dad story, so thanks for calling. Don't fall off your bar stool. Again. That last one almost killed you.

Friend: THAT WAS MEAN

Me: yes, I know

Friend: I took the day off today so I thought me might have LUNCH, but since you're "busy"...

Me: LOVE being your beck and call friend. Lunch isn't good for me one way or the other. Let's hang up before this becomes ugly. You are being an ASS and I am not sure why I am the target but, don't make me pull out my dictionary....

Friend: OH that's right, you're so smart and you think you are sooooo talented. Jesus how do you live with yourself?

Me: YOU called ME. Thank you for the asshole, now I have two.

Friend: I wanted to have LUNCH, that's why I called

hung up, (hard to slam a cell phone, I hate that) in my mind I am thinking -  really? thank you for the tirade. At least I keep mine where you can avert your eyes. Shouldn't have said that Coors thing, yes, I should...20 BEERS IS NOT AN ACCOMPLISHMENT.

phone rings

Friend: DID YOU HANG UP ON ME?

Me: no, lost the connection took it as a sign from God that we don't need to talk right now

Friend: so are we going to lunch?

Me: NO, we are not. It is almost three in the afternoon and I thought I divorced you once...no, that was someone just like you. CALL YOUR GIRLFRIEND AND BE AN ASS TO HER. THAT IS HER JOB, TO PUT UP WITH YOUR CRAP. I AM YOUR FRIEND. SORTA, AS OF NOW.

You know how people go through their Facebook "friends" and delete a few? I am mentally doing that. So if you call and I don't answer, a lot, well......you've been deleted.

Lillybell