I am standing there looking at Elsie thinking: this is either a test, a very cruel algebra final exam-like test or a sign. Yes, me too, definitely a test. How in the name of Karma, God, Satan, some unknown diety, what or who would bring this man to this house at this time. Really? Too bad he didn't have on a wedding ring. Or a tan line around his finger. Zelda and I talked about my moving in and Elsie is all about helping anyway he can. Uh huh. Then Zelda says, "You know Space Opera is playing at Tootsie's tonight?" In Fort Worth this is like a Beatles reunion. "We have to go", says Parade Boy. We??? Who is we??? "I stopped this, "Zelda let's go eat at Angelo's and then go to Tootsie's to try and find a table". Tootsie's was slightly bigger than a walk in closet, outside. Elsie is all for this. "I could pick one of you up? I only have the two seats". "I bet we see you there", I said, "You'd have to be invisible to be missed on the patio". We all talked and laughed. LAUGHED. I had not laughed in so long. Not real laughter. I was loving being me and not being under some man's thumb.
Life was good. Tootsie's was fun. Space Opera was fabulous as they always were. We all drank and danced and laughed and waited for the last note of the last encore. "I would love for you to come see my house", Elsie slurred. "I would like that, maybe sometime this week", I said. "I was thinking about now." said blue eyes and killer smile man. "Elsie, I will not be in the parade. I don't do that anymore. My relationships will no longer be casual. I hope you understand, if not, bummer. I can't waste time. All I want is to be happy and within a couple of years, I will have a baby. Sorry, I just don't see you there."
After a few seconds of trying to figure out what I was talking about he said, "well, I guess we could go to your place". Yeah, not getting it. "Elsie, NO, not sleeping with you. Won't get in line".
He totally did not understand what I was talking about. Something about several cocktails and a new spine confused smiling blue eyed man. "Well, can I come by for a cocktail?" I said, you can do whatever you want. I will be going to floor, (no bed yet), as soon as I am tired and then you have to leave". In my head I was going, "TA DA". Then he actually followed us home and visited for a bit and left like a gentleman. Whoa, I have POWER.
Later in the morning, it was after all about 4:30 when Elsie left, I was awaken by a faniliar sound. Something ringing far away. Phone, Zelda with phone in her hand. It's not a real good idea to wake up Zelda. I answer the call like it's my dad calling because that's what I feared but, no, Elsie. "You still coming over for dinner?" Uh, dinner? Did we talk about dinner, it sounded familiar. "Well, ok, but first I need sleep. I will call you later. Zelda have your number?" "Let me give it....", "no, sleep. call you. Bye". MORE POWER
I laid in bed and thought of 100 excuses to not go. I was not, NOT going to make any mistakes. NO ONE is getting close to me. NO ONE is getting near my heart. period. Then I got dressed called Elsie and told him I was on my way. Face the demon. Do Not Let Him Call The Shots.
We had a lovely dinner and I went home. The next day was Monday and I went to work, off to the print shop. The flowers arrived around noon. When I got home there was a man mowing our lawn, a very steep nasty lawn. Elsie was sweating his ass off. He had put his mower in his Z car and driven it to our house to mow the lawn, FOR FREE. Yes, I have stepped through the looking glass. Oh sure, he wants to make nice. Well, it just might work.
But not yet.
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