Here's how it all happened. On the night before Oops' day off I called him and asked him to get a ride to work, (girlfriend), because we had a rush job at the shop that no one could handle but me. Yes, he would get a ride to and from work. I left the shop and drove to my parent's house. They were having dinner. I walked in and explained that I needed a favor. Would they please follow me home in both cars, 1 medium land yacht, 1 huge land yacht, and leave me the biggest car. Get in their other car, drive home and leave the door unlocked.
My time was ticking away and I didn't need a bunch of questions. Dad of course started with the why are you doing this and why can't you use your own car and what on earth was happening. "Could you please just do this and I will explain later." No, of course not. I explained briefly, "He beats me, I have to get out NOW and I have to leave my car there....I will explain just PLEASE this once, follow me to my house and yell at me later". Now dad is all macho and he is going to wait at the house with me and explain things to Oops with a bat. "Dad, I have thought of nothing but this for more than a year, please, let's go".
We got to my house, they left me the huge car. Oops was at work. I waited til dark. I started loading the car. P A system, speakers, HUGE speakers at least for me, monitor, microphones, stands, boards and MY guitar. The Martin D-35 had been lost in an incident I refer to as the Unfortunate El KaBong. My dear grandfather had sent me enough money to buy my own, real grown up instrument and I treasured it, My Guild D-55, (if you have been paying attention imagine how much I loved a guitar with a model number 55). The music stuff went in the car first. Then I started loading albums, clothes, personal items I didn't want destroyed and things I new my parents would kill me if I came home without. Then I got the dog leash and removed the claw hammer from off the bed side rail.
When the car was packed to the headliner, trunk full, only the front seat empty, I drove it around the corner to another street and parked it under a street light. I walked home. Then I waited. Claw hammer under the seat cushion, feigning sleep. I heard a car and knew that freedom was so close. My heart was POUNDING. The door opened. I lay there quiet and breathing regularly best I could. I prayed he would not open the music room door, that was the one thing he could not see. He stumbled down the hall, turned on the window unit and collapsed in a stupor. PERFECT.
I waited until the snoring was even and loud and tiptoed in the bedroom. I stole his car keys, went out in the back yard in to the shed, found the flashlight I had stashed there. Got the Polaroid Camera and pictures, opened a small tin box, took out a small package and replaced it with his car keys. He had chased me before and "pulled me over" in the most unpleasant way. He wouldn't be driving tonight.
I went back through the house, grabbed the leash and claw hammer. Snoring still loud and even. Good. I went to the far gate and got the dog. She had to be quiet. Put on the leash and walked to the parked car around the corner. FREEDOM!!!! All I had to do now was drive.
No. I had one more thing to do. I drove back to the house where Oops lay sleeping. I pulled up to the curb, left the dog in the car and walked up to the front door. I had my hammer, two pictures and the small package in my pocket from the tool shed. This was going to be my shining moment.
I opened the bedroom door and turned on the light. Oops stirred. "HEY", I said, "YOU'RE WIFE IS LEAVING AND SHE HAS SOME RULES". I went on to explain that in the morning, after he located the car keys, he would contact an attorney, file for a divorce, pay for it, he would drive MY car until the divorce was final and once the car was in my possession I would sign the papers, he would make all payments on the car otherwise I would have him arrested for stealing my car. It was about now that he got out of bed. I showed him the hammer. "I will kill you", I said, he sat down. Then I threw the pictures of my bruised face on the bed. "If you ever fuck with me, my family, my workplace, enter any place that I happen to be these will be plastered everywhere you go for the rest of your life. I will go to every store, every club, every shelter you can find and I will tell everyone what a pig you are. You do things MY WAY. I have no more fear, you might want to develop a little".
Then I took the small package from my pocket. It was a pair of earrings I had found in our bed. Not one earring, a pair. I showed them to him and said, "tell the girlfriend that I am keeping these in trade for you. Also tell her that one earring is a mistake, two earrings...you get what you deserve."
I walked out, got in the loaded yacht and laughed and hooted and yahooed all the to my parents. I tossed the earrings somewhere on 820.
Now, all I had to do was face my parents. I was ready.
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